Friday, March 28, 2014


I have a new man in my life.

Reader: You are a missionary. You don't have another man in your life unless you had a new child I don't know about. Do you have a new baby boy Sarah? You better.

 Frank Stallone. Jackson's Favorite Singer. Singer of Eye of the Tiger. A classic.

Chill reader. Chill. It's not the guy above because this man is not in fact a man. 

It is an oil.

Reader: Well, that is just ridiculous.

Jesus liked this oil. (I assume this. Otherwise, the wise men really screwed up, and they were wise.)

Frankincense (which for some reason for me is a biotch to spell) is da bomb dot com. (I said it)

Some amazing things that good ol Frank does:

Stress Relief. Improves Wrinkles. Fades Sun Spots. Helps Fade Scar Tissue. Relieves Itching Skin. Relieves Pain. Disinfects Cuts and Scrapes. Removes Warts. Reduces Inflammation. Strengthens Immune System. Eases Pain. Stops Itching. Enhances Visual Acuity. Improve Concentration. Strengthens Brittle Nails. Removes Cysts. Removes Moles. Removes Skin Tags. 
(I would love to tell you all of the ways to use these besides the above summaries, but I am too lazy to do that much detailed work. This will have to do. If you buy oils from me or sign up for the kit, I am all yours. Until then, you get lazy Sarah.)
I have a story about moles and warts coming in the near future. Two stories. One about a woman. One about a man. Riveting I tell you. Riveting.
Reader: Sarah, this post really let me down. I expected some good stuff from you because your last post was basically just a picture of your kid and husband. Step it up next time. 

Reader: However, this picture is quite funny. Did you create it yourself? 
Why yes, I did. I am dabbling in a site called picmonkey. It's the beginning. We shall see what happens.
Reader: Alright, I'll check back for your next blog post. This won you a few points. Like 1 1/2 points. 
Don't Have A Frank In Your Life? Treat Yo Self!
To sign in as a normal customer OR to get your Premium Starter Kit and get 24% off on all purchases in the coming year as a Wholesale Member (Amazing, I know)


  1. Improves wrinkles? I need a vat of the stuff to swim in!

  2. Yes! I'll send you something about it. It's my favorite oil.