Friday, March 28, 2014

Walking Dead: Guatemala Style

Yesterday,  I experienced the end of the world.

Ok, not really the end of the world. But, John would say that at many points throughout the day, I acted like it was the end of the world.

We found out a few days ago that they (whomever they are) were going to cut all of the electricity in our town, and the 4 other towns around us, for 10 hours. This included all businesses and even restaurants.

Reader: Say what? How is your Burger King gonna be fresh if there aint no electricity to keep that patty cold?

Exactly my friend. Exactly. How are they going to keep the produce cold? (I just realized produce does not actually need to be cold.) How are they going to keep milk and cheese cold? How are they going to keep the meat cold?!

Apparently, they don't care. Apparently they don't care about the e-coli that will grow. (Is that what happens when meat gets warm? I don't even know. I know it's not good.)

Yesterday at 7:34 am, all power within 45 minutes of us...wait for it...was turned off.

The end of the world, as I knew it.

It was 96 degrees here.

It was hot.

It was quiet. Eerily quiet.

What do you do in silence? In heat? With a two year old?

Well, you get in the car and drive 25 minutes to Burger King because you secretly hope that they were not really going to be shutting down businesses. (Cause that's just loco! (crazy for all you English speakers out there.))

Burger King: No power. Doors open. (I guess to let more heat and dirt in.)
Grocery store where we buy our precious chicken: No power. Doors open..

Reader: Sarah. What. Did. You. Do?

Well, we drove one hour in the opposite direction and did what any good-minded American would do. We went to McDonalds.

Reader: Sarah, you have now gone to Burger King and McDonalds in one day. What has happened to you?

I know. I know. It's sad. Our tastes have suffered by living here, but our hearts have grown. (Except for the days that they turn off our power. Then, my heart shrinks down to a tiny black pebble, and I want to smack them all in the face.)

Our Day: (I would like to state, in order to earn a little bit of credit, that quite often, we are without power here. It is just never for this long. I am not a total wimp. Just a little one.)
  • We sat in McDonalds and had a nice meal...(sarcasm)
  • We walked around the non air-conditioned mall. (Has a grocery store connected and I got hazelnut coffee creamer...success! Guys, coffee creamer is so hard to find here. I don't like for my coffee to taste like coffee. Ever. This means that I have to drive to far off destinations for my morning delight..not that kind of morning delight.)
Reader: Girl, I was gonna say....
  • We drove home, started melting, and got back in the car
  • We drove to a local hotel with no power, but with a pool
  • We swam in a pool that had not been cleaned in a while
  • We came home right before the power was supposed to come back on
  • The power didn't come back on
  • I started panicking
  • John told me to calm down
  • I started crying (not physically on the outside, but on the inside, I was a waterworks)
  • John rolled his eyes
  • I started running around like a crazy person
  • Jackson, my two year old, slapped me (not really, but I think he wanted to)
  • I started singing "It's the end of the world as we know it."
  • Jackson cut his foot and asked me to put OILS on it! (Purification oil: done and done)
  • I started comparing our lives to the Walking Dead series.
  • I started to plan my move back to the United States (I'm a little ashamed of this, but at the time was in fact very serious about it...I don't know where the other comma goes here. I feel that there needs to be another comma, but can't figure it out. Let's all just agree now that my grammar won't be perfect, which will kill my mother since she is an English teacher.)
  • An hour and a half later, the power came back on
  • I decided it wasn't all that bad
  • John rolled his eyes again
So, to sum up. It was not like the Walking Dead to anyone else but me. I am the only one who panicked. In fact, when I stared out at everyone else on the street, I realize that they were not really effected at all. They don't have electricity to begin with. They don't have air conditioning. They cook their food on an open stove. They don't have refrigerators. Some of the kids that we minister to here, sleep on the floor.

So, to sum up..again. I am a snob. I am spoiled. I am a brat, but I love electricity. I love air conditioning. I love well-kept meat. I love running water. (Because the electricity was out, the water could not get pumped into our house.) I love oils. 

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