Tuesday, April 22, 2014


I know.

Gross blog title.

In fact, I wanted to name it penis, but John told me not to.

Here is the deal.

I have seen way to many penis's...penai....penissss...peniss'...penises! lately.

(I don't spell the word all that often, so it took me a second.)

Too much urine too.

It's really starting to piss me off. (Get it?!)

Guatemalan men LOVE to pee on the side of the road.

Some love to pee into the tires of their big trucks.

Some love to pee on the side of their car.

Some like to climb up the hill a little bit and pee down the hill.

Some (many) like to pee right on the side of the highway facing you as you drive slowly past.

Slowly, because you are inevitably behind a melon truck that is driving 5 miles per hour.

Because of this, I have seen many male body parts that I just don't want to see.

I guess just one in particular.

I would like to state here, that you never EVER see a female Guatemalan popping a squat on the side of the road.

No, we women have endurance and class.

Reader: Sarah, don't include yourself with them. You do not have class. You are writing about penises. Plus, it took way too much time for you to learn how to spell it.

Fair enough.

Guatemalan women have practiced restraint. You never see a single one of them peeing on the side of the road.

I am thinking about protesting this urine problem.

However, I could get shot.

Reader: Sarah, why don't you close your eyes?

That would be the obvious answer, but it is kind of like watching a train wreck, you can't look away even though you really wish you weren't seeing it.

Reader: How do oils fit into this?

Well, I wish there was an oil that could make you un-see things.

I actually googled it.

There isn't.

The only oils dealing with memories are ones that help.

So, maybe that could be the next oil blend they make. One that helps with short term memory loss.

Reader: You could just start smoking weed.

I am a missionary. How dare you sir. How dare you.

On a lighter note, after doing much research, there are two great oils for memory retention. So, if you haven't been seeing lots of Guatemalan men peeing on the side of the road, and in fact, what to increase your mental capacity, check these out!

No comments:

Post a Comment